Bonds

Alex: Then Holden showed up.

It was a tectonic shift where everything I thought I knew about myself got rearranged.

It was like I finally fell in love for real.

All the cracks and missing pieces came together.

I felt whole. I'd found my soul mate.

I couldn't stop smelling his head. It made me feel drowsy and giddy,

like we were in the middle of a lavender field in the south of France.

The smell was real. He truly smelled like fresh lavender.

It was and always will be my drug of choice.

I even wondered if I truly loved John, because my feelings for him were never as powerful as my feelings for Holden. And I've always felt guilty because I never quite bonded like that with Scarlett when she was a baby.

It was a special kind of love. Maybe a once in a lifetime thing.

And then he disappeared.

American Horror Story - Hotel (2015)